You are going to have fun with Webdesign & Blogging this summer! Welcome to class!

- Blogged from Word 2007 -

I thought I had a really clever idea recently. The subject of digital signatures often comes up in computer workshops I teach. For several years now, I have been pointing everyone to the Microsoft website where they recommend a couple of places where you can buy digital signatures. Microsoft lists three sources. Two of the three have affiliate programs.

Duh! Why had it never occurred to me to become an affiliate and make some money off these recommendations I make all the time.

Well, it turned out a lot more convoluted – and just plain – stupid than it should have been.

One program insisted I talk to this other program. So we exchanged some emails. No problem.

Then there were phone calls. Not one, but a couple of them.

All I wanted to do is sign up. There is nothing sophisticated or complicated about an affiliate program. There are literally THOUSANDS of them around. And, frankly, they should WANT me! I can carry purchasers right to their electronic doorstep!

But, no, the first program wanted me to touch base with this second program for the Adobe products. Okay, no biggie. Send me an email and let me get back to work.

But, no, they wanted a teleconference. At my expense. For an hour.

I already SAID I was interested. What was the point?

Well, it turns out it would take 45 minutes for their technical expert to explain to me (a computer trainer with a master’s degree in Instructional Systems Technology) how to use a digital signature on an Adobe product.

Wait a minute. There is no way I would ever expect to spend 45 minutes explaining HOW to use a digital signature with anything. If it is really that complicated, no one in their right mind would use it. And neither would I.

Then, the Adobe tech “double-booked” herself. Double-speak for another client was more important? Yeah, they must be if they are willing to endure an hour long teleconference over something so trite. I hope she gets lots of commissions through them because she won’t be getting any through me.

I regret that I ever considered this. From now on, I’ll just tell everyone to Google “digital signatures.”

Oh, look what happens when you do that. The top three are not even these bozos that have been wasting my time. Here they are. Read them on your own.

I have work to do.

Free Digital Signature

www.EchoSign.com/Digital Used By Fortune 500 And Worldwide Try It Now - It Only Takes Seconds.

Electronic Signatures

www.InterlinkElectronics.com E Signature Software & ePads Legally Binding eSignature Pad

Digital Signatures

www.Arx.com Digital Signatures Made Simple. Expedite Processes & Cut Costs.

- Blogged from Word 2007 -

I’m liking my Wii Fit. For the most part. I like the Mii a lot! The Mii is your “persona” like an avatar in other worlds.

Things I Love about Wii Fit:

• Great feedback. Fun.
• Go at my own speed.
• Good exercise modules.
• I can turn it off when I want!
• Actually I am ambivalent about this one: my Wii reminds me how long it has been since I last was on the Wii. She’s nice about it. But if I haven’t been on it, I already feel guilty!
• The yoga trainer animation is superb. I APPRECIATE THE FACT THAT EVEN SHE DOES NOT STAND PERFECTLY STILL! haha

Things I don’t love or wish could be different:

• Jarring difference in characters between Yoga and Aerobics modules. Reminds me of going to the report writing dialog window in Microsoft Access where suddenly it looks like some contractor created the module in his basement without thinking to look at what the team was creating – and it was too late to correct it before release time.
• An audience – yes, an AUDIENCE – for the step aerobics. HATE IT. I like the Wii because I don’t want an audience. I am not about to get up on a stage to do step aerobics, even with a bunch of Mii’s. And don’t applaud. That doesn’t help. I know I am not good at step aerobics so the applause is for the Mii’s and not ME.
• Why doesn’t a Wii have a weight scale? It is smart enough to know if I am stepping/standing on it and if I am stepping/standing in the right place and for the right amount of time. It oughta have a scale.
• Don’t use a PIG to count my exercise points, please.
• I skipped the Warrior pose in Yoga. I know it is probably ancient tradition but I am not going to participate in anything pro-War, thank you very much. Can we rename it? The Peace Pose, maybe? I respect history but, let’s face it, ancient yoga masters never envisioned a Mii performing those moves.
• Make the Yoga Instructor and the Mii’s wear their control on their wrist, too.

Unintentional Wii Games – I have come up with some games for people like me who hate exercise. (The only class I ever cut in school was PE! Seriously….)

• I can point to my Mii’s feet and make her jump.
• It’s fun NOT to bend toward the hula-hoops so they bonk my Mii on her head.
• I like to randomly click on my Mii until she looks behind her. Pick the right time, and she doesn’t just turn around – she LOOKs behind her trying to figure out what you were clicking on!

Overall, the Wii Fit is pretty decent. Get one!

There is a new treaure online. 1903 Goulds Directory listing of people living in St Charles, Mo..  Alphabetical list of names only.There are a few hundred names on this list.

http://genealogytrails.com/mo/stcharles/1903goulds.html

Did you order yours yet? I have a delivery confirmation that the Wii Fit for my Wii will be here on Tuesday!

Get a $10 Walmart.com gift card when you preorder Wii Fit (to be delivered on or just after May 21)!

They say, “Write what you know.” Stephen Diller has never been to Peoria, Illinois, judging from his movie, “Peoria Babylon.”

I live near Peoria and work there. This movie ain’t Peoria.

And that’s too bad, actually, because the concept was great!

Unfortunately, the movie plays like a stageplay filmed with a home movie camera. Everything was lit wrong. It reminded me of the 16mm home movies my dad took with this humongous light-bar he didn’t understand and couldn’t control.

It actually would be a decent stageshow. If they corrected the glaring misperceptions. Even tho I was watching it in my living room, I have been to enough dinner theatre that I had this eerie feeling that, at any moment, there would be an intermission and Ann Cusack (yes, sister of John and Joan, et al), who was the main female character, would appear and ask if I wanted weak ice tea or bad coffee with my dinner.

Hard to believe that, two years earlier, Ann was in my all-time favorite movie, “Tank Girl.” Got it in English and Spanish, and two copies of the sound-track.

Ann was a trooper to do well with what she had to work with in “Peoria Babylon.” The rest of the cast appeared to be actors who didn’t have enough busfare to get to a place remote enough to have dinner theatre that stage this performance.

The truly weird thing about this movie is that most of the cast reminded me of someone else. My husband and I agreed that, in several scenes, Ann Cusack looked like a young Terri Garr. The idiot art foe suddenly looks like a young John Goodman when the pink fog appears (don’t ask!).

Then there was who sounded, and even looked a little, like… that guy who played Carla’s ex-husband in “Cheers.” Okay, neither character is memorable.

And speaking of Roul, the biggest crime problem in Peoria is not Italian thugs: it is gangs. Read a newspaper! And the police department DOES handcuff perps when they haul them in.

The young artist looked like…. someone I can’t place.

But I really took exception to Steven Diller’s misperceptions of Peoria. They weren’t even funny. It is NOT true that there is only one art gallery in Peoria. Diller doesn’t have a clue about art in Peoria — or Peoria, for that matter. Guess he has never heard of Preston Jackson. Or the Peoria Art Guild. Or the Contemporary Art Center. See, Steven, Peoria DOES have more than one gallery! Especially if you could the college galleries at Bradley.

And, for the record, the “Peoria Museum” should be Lakeview Museum. It is embarrassing to admit that the current exhibit, opening today, is “Grossology: The (Impolite) Science of the Human Body” and their permanent collection does include duck decoys.

But Lakeview does have a Rodin. Really. They do. It’s not on their website, like the duck decoys, but they really do have a Rodin. Really, Steven, they do!

And everyone knows the Peoria “art scene” is down by the waterfront. How can you film a movie about Peoria and not include the waterfront? Oh, that’s right… it wasn’t filmed in Peoria.

But, back to the movie. I actually liked the actor keeping his entire wardrobe on wardrobe racks! That was fun. Too bad he had a habit of glancing at the camera at odd times. Or was it cue cards. Nah, couldn’t have been cue cards. The dialog wasn’t that complex.

The gay bar scenes were pointless. The first gay bar scene was so confusing — especially when the actors stepped out of character. Cut the scene — not because of the gay bar but because it was so stupidly executed it should have been executed.

Of course, the gay bar scene really served as a vehicle so that Ann Cusack could order cocktails (why in a gay bar, I’m still wondering….). She kept ordering “a cocktail over ice” as if “cocktail” is a generic word in Peoria because we’re so unsophisticated. Actually, it made Ann Cusack look like she is so stupid that SHE doesn’t know the name of a single cocktail.

It was almost funny until the last scene when her partner-in-crime orders a Bloody Mary in the same bar. Why didn’t he order a “cocktail”? The Bloody Mary served no purpose. Consistency, consistency, consistency, Steven!

The final scene was actually quite good. It does make the movie almost worth sitting through to get to that point. Well, except that it is filmed in the basement of an art museum and, once again, the lighting is so glaringly bright that everyone is pale as a ghost.

The final scene could have been a bit longer. Steve, you skimped on the best part of the movie!

Try it again as dinner theatre. Cut the gay bar scene (there are gays in Peoria and it isn’t any funnier here than it is in New York or L.A.). Oh, and, as far as the corn icon in opening frames … ever hear of Herb Eaton? Well, of course not, since you don’t know Peoria. I first discovered Herb when he was in his corn phase. Oh, and he was born in Peoria. His corn art should have been used instead of the clipart!

Joke’s on you, Steven. You really were in Babylon and you really didn’t comprehend the conversation.

Try again, Steve. Thanks Netflix. It was a hoot!

I see the Michigan Genealogy Trails has updates.

Several counties with vital records. Allegan, Barry, Berrien, Branch, Cass, Clinton, Eaton, Genessee, Hillsdale, Ingham, Ionia, Jackson, Kalamazoo, Kent, Lapeer, Lenawee, Livingston, Macomb, Marquette, Midland, Monroe and Montcalm.

BERRIEN Bios of Fisher & Kaiser

DELTA Christenings

GRAND TRAVERSE Cemetery Data and a News Article

HURON 1850/1860/1870 Mortality Schedule

IOSCO Cemetery List

KENT Marriages

OAKLAND Pioneers — Photo

PRESQUE ISLE

ROSCOMMON Cemetery List

SANILAC 1850 Mortality Schedule

TUSCOLA 1850 Mortality Schedule

Christine Walters - Host
http://genealogytrails.com/mich/

Did you know you can find family histories at Alibiris? Type “Michigan Genealogy” or a county name such as “Berrien County Michigan Genealogy” in the Subject search box.  And you’ll often find used books for great prices. Even the new ones are often at lower prices than elsewhere.

I really do wish all the movie rental places would stop spamming me. I have said it before and I’ll say it again: I’m sold on Netflix. Don’t ask me to change.

I started out with the least expensive rental agreement. Then I went to the next…. and now I really, really, really want the Netflix Player.

Yes, Netflix is that good.

The last movie I rented was one that should have gotten more notice. I have actually seen it so many times I can almost recite the whole movie. What was it? It was a John Cusack movie. It had Paul Newman in it. It had Laura Dern in it. It had Bonnie Bedelia in it.

You haven’t seen “Fat Man and Little Boy”? Rent movies from Netflix! It is a memorable account of the story of the invention of the nuclear bomb by J. Robert Oppenheimer’s team of scientists at Los Alamos. Who says you can’t make a documentary fascinating?

My husband rented “Jay and Silent Bob.” Not my cup of tea. Not a problem. Netflix has a feature that allows you to create two separate viewing lists. It would be great for kids because the “owner” controls the second list.

I happen to be a big fan of the “watch instantly” feature. Last night, instead of watching “Jay and Silent Bob” or television I am not interested in, I watched Fraulein, the story of three women coming to terms with the lives they left behind in Yugoslavia.

Yes, I happen to like foreign movies — a lot. And I don’t mind subtitles. I find it intriguing to watch movies filmed on location where I get to see what their restaurants are like, their sidewalks, their cars, the way they decorate their homes.

Fraulein was a heartwarming story with three endings. I thought the movie was over, and had a happy ending. But there was more. I thought the second ending was also happy. But there was more… and you’ll just have to watch it to experience the actual ending!

For some insane reason, I agreed to teach web design at College for Kids this summer — for FOUR weeks! What was I thinking….

I normally only teach adults. When I was asked for a course description, I (once again) didn’t think twice and included blogging.

I had no idea this was going to be such an issue. Oh, I know all the legal issues but it took quite a long time to find a way for kids to blog. It can be done. There are safe blog tools out there for educators.

But I was really sweating for awhile about how I was going to carry through on my promise to get the kids blogging. I will probably go with edublogs.org. We’ll see. I just got an account set up.

What is really interesting about the class I’ll be teaching is the age of the students. The course is divided into three groups: Grades 10-12; Grades 7-9; and Grades 4-6.

I should turn this into a quiz but I don’t have time. Which group do you think has filled already?

It’s the Grades 4-6. We’re a month away from class. School isn’t even out yet. And the YOUNGEST kids signed up en masse.

I actually thought the mention of blogging would draw the older kids. I don’t know how many have signed up, but the two courses for each of the older age groups has not filled.

Now I’m curious to meet these 4th through 6th graders and find out why they are taking the class.